Feb 11, 2006

I'm in love with R but E won't leave me alone WTF.

Hey guys, just wanted to get some advice from the team. See recently I met this beautiful girl, we'll call her "R". She was waitressing at AB in the V. I walked in to meet some friends after work at SF one night & R immediately caught my eye. She was like an angel the way she "glided" across the floor serving her customers tasty dishes with a smile. I met my compadres at a table which happened to be in her section & I ordered my traditional Guiness Stout. 6 pints later I worked up the courage to ask her for her number & we have been talking ever since. I get all nervous when we talk because R is such a PYT & I would love to be the one to show her some TLC. Thing is I was involved in a long term relationship that ended horribly recently with a girl named "J" she traumatized me so much that I think I now am afraid to get romatically involved with someone new. The more I think about how badly I was hurt by J the more I want to call her a B but that wouldn't be very PC. Moving on...
R is significantly younger than me. At 21 years old R is attractive, has a great personality & is really having a great time going out & experiencing all the new things you experience when you turn 21. I KNOW I am not the only guy that hollered at R, I would love to spark something with her but I am afraid of it ending badly. I don't want to let her close to my heart in the fear of R breaking my ever so fragile heart of glass as it were. So instead I settle for a "casual" relationship with a girl named "E". Now E & I have nothing in common but it is a marriage of convenience so to speak. I get my needs taken care of & she no longer feels lonely. Meanwhile I can't get R out of my mind. If only J hadn't broken my heart I think I may have had the courage to pursue R & tell her my true feelings.

But I just don't want to be hurt.....I just don't want to be hurt.


Langdon Alger said...

I don't know how many times I gotta tell you that its all about "R"..forget about "E"...she's a total waste of your T-I-M-E and E-N-E-R-G-Y...oh, and I'm glad you didn't mention "S" cuz she's all M-I-N-E!!

Tsuji Eriku said...

S is my butterfly but if I even tried to "holla" the CPS would be at my door faster than DSL on my PC. So it's best that I keep my love for S on th "QT" but she'll always be a VIP in my life.

Hikaru_Doumuoji said...

Tsuji eriku, i have to agree with Mr. Alger. its all about "R." Now, I haven't been in many relationships because i'm bad when it comes to hollering at girls. I can't tell whether or not they dig me. I have a shallow mind when it comes to that. hahaha! But you, mr tsuji, what you have in front of you is genuine. see, you have your mind stuck in the past. yes, your heart was broken, but in order to heal your heart, you can't let it mend by yourself. If she is as special as you say she is, you should let her be apart of your life and help you mend what was once broken. Wakarimasu ka? When in doubt find inspiration with Orange Days Ne. Ganbatte ne! Anata wa on'na no ko ga ganbarimasho.

Tsuji Eriku said...

goddamit Hikaru.

JuanJohn said...

"Anata wa on'na no ko ga ganbarimasho"
Lets do our best with your female child?
but seriously, the same thing is happening to me, my last relationship ended horribly and I'm afraid to get a new one started as well. But I'm going to try because being with someone special that makes you feel truly alive is the best.
When things we're good with my last gf, I was on top of the world.
I miss that feeling ;(

Terrence Maddox said...

If we let our pasts run our lives, most of us (including me) wouldn't even leave the house. If you can acknowledge your confidence in the face of risking failure, more power & luck to everyone taking a chance for a good thing.

I love how real-life chix are initials here on the blog.

BVA said...

I have to agree with Mr. Maddox but I must put it in my own words so here goes. You're afraid of it ending badly? What the hell is the matter with you? Take a risk. If it ends badly, so what. You lived through it before, live through it again.
Things to do for tsuji:
1. Grow a pair
2. Tell "E" to pound salt
3. Take a chance with this "R"

Tsuji Eriku said...

BVA you're gay! How could you possibly know about an intimate love between a man & a woman? Bro, get the balls outta your face & have at least one relationship with a member of the OPPOSITE SEX before trying to give me advice. Nah but seriously you're gay. Sorry Langdon.

southerncaligirl said...

Dear Confused-

Ok...forget the advice from all these guys, how about some advice from the female side?

If you aren't willing to take the risk then how will you ever find "the one" (and i'm not talking Jet Li)?

If you really think she is worth getting to know, then screw your inhibitions and ask her out. Otherwise, you will spend a few days/weeks asking yourself "Why did I never ask her out?"

As for E, if she is just your F-friend, then that relationship is worth ending. Especially if you are ready to ask R out. You don't want the extra baggage. It will only cause drama.

And....by asking R out, you really aren't risking anything. You may find out you really don't like her. If you do end up liking her and the feeling is mutual, then there you go. Wasn't it worth it?

Don't worry about getting hurt. It's not worth the stress. You need to get hurt a few times before finding a worthwhile relationship.

Ann Landers