People who Complain

"Complain, Complain" In my job, I hear it every f'n day. Especially, this one person on my team. I think she complains 365 days a year. She is never satisfied at her job or even in LIFE. Complains about little thing and big things, it does not matter. She complains all day!!! I'm tired of it. I mean I have my grips about my job but I do not openly talk about for everyone to hear.

Here's one example, being a team player that I am, I took care of one her clients, since she was not in. When it was done, I informed her that the work was done. Then she says, "I told you I'll work on it." blah blah blah...f'n unsatisfied yatch..If she was not on this team, I think I would be happier in this position. Man, there is other stories to tell too...But I don't want my first blog to about her.

I'll write more if I hear anymore complaints, is there anyway I could wire her jaw shut?? hahaha stupid beeyyyyaaattccchhhh!!

Thanks for reading fellow bloggers....Have a good day....

Had to be when I wore white

When I wear white, I'm always conscious of what my day has in store for me....especially mindful of activities that will dirty my shirt & leave me looking like a slob the rest of the day. Do I have a work lunch @ an Italian or Mexican restaurant? Fumbling pens all day? This crossed my mind as I put on my white Golden State Warriors shorts. The only time I wear white shorts is when I play ball, & they usually stay dirt, if not sweat, free. Couple of games? I should be fine.

1st game goes by w/o incident. I jumped in right when I got there so it was my warm-up game, as my 0-3 FGs prove. 2nd game is going good. 2-3 on shots. Blocked the bejeezus outta my man after he tried to shake me, prompting a "Good Defense" line from him (I know this, biznatch). I go up for a rebound with 3 other dudes when.....BAM. Big Honky Elbow comes down on my mouth, & blood is flying out. The game is stopped & I'm spitting blood like crazy. My DNA is all over the court as it comes outta my mouth in goops. I stagger towards the nearby water fountain, & one of my teammates says "Go to the other one. It's colder & cleaner." A much farther walk than the nearest fountain later, I'm rinsing out the blood. The dude that hit me comes over, checking on me & apologizing. I don't sweat honest accidents, so I tell him not to trip. As I watch the rest of the game next to my homey w/ the sprained ankle, I put my head down to rest for a second. That's when I see blood all over the white shorts. I wish it all would've landed on my black DX shirt. At least I still have all my teeth. Thank Your Higher Deity for small favors.

Wanted

One of the perks at the bookstore/café I work at is that employees are allowed to check out books. Of course I headed straight for the graphic novel section.

I checked out Wanted, a story by Mark Millar with art by J.G. Jones. It's about Wesley Gibson, a total puss. He's got a crummy job, a crummy life, and his girlfriend cheats on him with his best friend (I always wonder in stories about loser guys how they got girlfriends in the first place).

One day Wesley finds out his father (who had ran out on the family when Wesley was a baby) was killed, and now Wesley stands to inherit $50 million dollars. The catch is, Wesley's dad was a supervillain, and now Wesley has to train and live as a supervillain for six months in order to cash in. He gets indroctinated into the secret underworld of supercrime and quickly takes to killing, stealing, etc.

The dialogue and visuals were pretty brutal--loaded with "fucks" and "assholes" and heads getting blown off and sex and other shock value stuff.

The problem I had with the story was with Millar getting too cutesy. In the world of this book all the superheroes have been neutralized and the villains constantly make references to "the dark-night detective" or "the most powerful hero of all." And we never see these heroes; first, because the book's publisher is not Marvel or DC; second, Millar is using our knowledge of iconic comic book heroes (so he doesn't have to create his own heroes) to move his story along. There's even one major splash page devoted to showing a tattered red cape in a trophy case.

Gee, I wonder who's cape that was supposed to be? If we're not supposed to think it's Superman's, then what's the point of showing it? There are no other mentions or appearances in the story of that red cape, but somehow it merits an entire page to be highlighted? It's annoying little things like that that kept taking me out of the story.

The villains are supposed to be the focus, but Millar could have taken the time to give us a better sense of who the heroes of this world were -- as opposed to making shits-and-giggles allusions to Superman, Batman, Captain America, etc.

FJ

It's Back!!!!....Yakov of the Day...

Looks like the Bania of the Day was a freakin HUGE hit..but like I stated..it was only a one time thing..sorry to all those Bania fans out there...good news for the many Yakov fans out there though...cuz its back...I presents you with todays editon of YAKOV OF THE DAY!!!!...enjoy..

"In Russia, if a male athlete loses he becomes a female athlete."

SPECIAL EDITION...BANIA OF THE DAY

well, there was quite an uproar because I neglected to post a Yakov of the Day-Weekend Editon..sorry about that..went out of town to catch Kenny Bania...that guy is gold I tell ya...GOLD!!..so here's a one time BANIA OF THE DAY....enjoy...

"Why do they call it Ovaltine?... The mug is round. The jar is round... They should call it Roundtine."

The "RIGHT" gear

Today, I went out with the kids and went shopping for my oldest son's soccer gear. I headed out to Sportsmart but when I got there it is no longer Sportsmart it is now Sports Authority. I spent almost an hour looking for the "right" gear and when I say the "right" gear, I mean it all has to be the "right" gear. I had to find the cleats first, since it was a limited selection there. After, finding the cleats I had to find everything else in the same "brand" for the rest of his gear. So "ALL" Adidas nothing Nike, nothing Diadora but ALL Adidas. Call me a "brand label whore" I just needed everything to be the "right" gear.

He sure is cute though!!

Shootin' w/ Hell's Cherubs

I'm @ the park doing my morning free throw/jumpshot routine when I notice these 3 little girls heading in my direction. They had to be related in some way because they all looked like each other: a cross between my 8 yr old niece & that adorable kid from Dark Water. 2 of them are on scooters, while the 3rd one looks like she borrowed her older brother's skateboard. They start riding around the court that I'm shooting at. Except for when one of the scooterettes does a drive-by "Hello", there is no interaction between us. I shoot around while they encircle my court. When I finally pick up my keys to head home, they ride out to explore the rest of the park w/o a goodbye or any acknowledgment. It was weird but I couldn't help but smile. What topped it off for me was that the kid on the skateboard was talking on a cel the whole time.

Boobah - What is it about?

After a year of watching Boobah, I still have yet to figure out what their sole purpose is. I have heard that the show's intent is to help kids exercise. I'm sorry, but I would hardly call the "Look What I Can Do" segment of the show exercise.

My son has learned nothing by this show and even he cannot completely finish an episode. I however, am glued to the TV waiting for something to actually happen to prove that this show is educational.

Unsalted Kettle Chips

Why did I think these would be good? I was at the corner market buying a bell pepper and some potatoes for a stew I was making for dinner when I saw a sale on Kettle Chips by the register. The last time I had snacks in my cupboard was the almonds/cranberries mix I picked up at Trader Joe's. Those were long gone, so I figured it was time to buy something new to populate that empty second shelf in my kitchen cabinet.

I guess I wasn't in the mood for "Jalepeno w/Tequlla & Lime," or "Roasted Red Pepper w/Goat Cheese" chips, so that's probably why I picked up "Unsalted." I don't know what I was expecting for taste, but I'll tell you - there was nothing there. It had the crunch and texture of Kettle Chips, but there was NO taste. I guess potatoes are like tofu, you have to add something to bring out and enhance the flavor.

That's when I broke out the ground pepper and bleu cheese crumbles to top the chips. That worked perfectly. So if you want to go Iron Chef on your Kettle Chips - "Unsalted" is the place to start.

FJ

Now Leaving Dodge

After this weekend, if not sooner, I think most of my time will be spent holding up in my house w/ the exception of basketball/grocery outings. Synopsis: I have 2 friends, B & C. I'm a long-time buddy of B, who has brought C around the last couple of times we hung out. I met C through B a while ago, but have gotten to know C only recently since C has been coming around more often. To the chagrin of B, C seems to be taking a quick liking to me. The red flags on this are that C has a boyfriend, but the relationship is often strained by neglect & being an asshole. B also says C has "whore-like qualities", the least of which apparently includes keeping an eye out for someone better.

B has been complaining about C's antics for a while, but since C now seems to be "targeting" a close friend (me) B is especially on edge. Whenever C even touches my arm or hugs me, B gives me a disapproving look or kicks me under the table. Most of our phone/email conversations revolves around C & how annoyed B is.

This whole thing is wearing me out. I'm tired of worrying about what B is thinking every time I interact in any way w/ C. On the other side, I've been trying to give C the benefit of the doubt, thinking maybe she just appreciates someone being nice to her. Unfortunately I've heard about C long before I started hanging out w/ her, so not only am I aware of the track record, it looks a lil' bit closer to repeating itself each time we're out. To make things weirder, C will be living within walking distance from me by the end of this month.

I'm really not mad @ either of them but I think I need a break from that scene, which may also necessitate staying away from some mutual friends as well. Fortunately, 510 & 707 pals aren't part of that circle. Like Murtaugh said w/ drained yet sage-like wisdom in the Lethal Weapon epics: I'm too old for this shit.

Preemptive Random: Driving to work today, I saw a Jaguar on the freeway. 1st thing that came to mind was "Yuppy Blackhawk douchebag". I glanced @ the license plate, which said MICK JAG. If it makes me laugh, I'll give due credit: Pretty funny for a yuppy.

The Secret City

The Secret City had to be the best drawing show EVER. As amazed as I was by Bob Ross's happy little clouds, his paints and brushes weren't exactly things that kids had lying around the house. Commander Mark used pencils, pens, and markers--all implements easily pilfered from various drawers, counters, and desks in your house.

And the show had a sci-fi theme! Why? Commander Mark used his drawing lessons of aliens, spaceships, planets, futuristic buildings, etc., to teach you concepts like perspective, foreshortening, and cross-hatching. You'd be sitting there watching him draw a cool cartoony landscape, but all of a sudden you were learning about vanishing points. Damn you, Commander Mark and your valuable art lessons disguised as whimsical space illustrations. Well played, my eye-linered friend, ...well played.

The best part about The Secret City was the last five minutes of the show where Commander Mark would use the lessons he taught to add on to a giant mural of the Secret City. Kids who tuned in regularly would get to see him, armed only with his trusty marker and his imagination, build sections of the city on a big brightly colored wall.

Oh man, I wonder how many kids got busted for trying to draw their own "Secret City" on their bedroom walls.

The worst part of the show, however, had to be Commander Mark's gay robot companion, Zebtron. For a show so filled with creativity, I was amazed at how lame Zebtron was. It was just some guy in purple and black striped leotard and a silver helmet. No make-up either! You could see his plain ol' human face! I even think he wore glasses.

The only thing remotely "robotic" about him was his 70s-style robot dance movements (but he wasn't dancing), and his stupid generic robot voice. It was just a nasally monotone voice, you know what I mean--try it, "I am a robot." I'm doing the voice right now.

Zebtron's job was to hold up drawings sent in by kids and make supportive comments about their art. Yeah, that's real encouraging--kids seeking approval from an emotionless robot.

FJ

Yakov of the Day

Many and when I say "many" I mean one person, have asked me where I find all these fabulous Yakov Smirnoff jokes.....from Yakov Smirnoff silly!!...I've had the pleasure of venturing to good ol' Branson Missouri to actually see Yakov in person many times and like George W. said, "he IS still funny after all these years!"..

"There ought to be a caution sign as you enter the Yakov Smirnoff Theatre in Branson, Missouri. It should read “Warning! Hold on to your seat ‘cause this guy is about to blow you away with dynamite comedy!” This ‘guy’ of course is Branson’s Two-Time Comedian of the Year, Yakov Smirnoff, the famous Russian Comedian. He delivers explosive laughter in a show filled with brilliant special effects, dazzling dancing, heartfelt moments, and just plain fun. Yakov’s entire show is packed with comedic tall tales and witty perceptions, funny facts and huge laughs. "

for tickets, call 1-800-WHAT A COUNTRY...seriously..thats the number..

oh..and while you're in Branson..also be sure to check out the irreplaceable ANDY WILLIAMS..

Bathroom Etiquette

I'm in the bathroom @ work washing my glasses when a co-worker comes in & heads straight to an enclosed stall. As I dry off my glasses w/ my shirt I hear the familiar locking of the door, unbuckling of the pants & tearing of the seat cover. I think to myself, "If I have to #2, I'm not doing it w/ someone else there." As soon as I finish my thought, I hear a most terrible sound. The closest thing I can compare that noise to would be to imagine Donald Duck throwing up for a minute straight while trying to rap like Twista. I hurried out of the bathroom. The question is still stuck in my head: Am I the only one that would be offended as well as disgusted?

Yakov of the Day...

"In America, you have American Express, don't leave home without it....But in Russia, we have Soviet Express....DON'T LEAVE HOME!"

Enjoy a slice of island life this weekend...

Aloha Festival (Sat/6-Sun/7)

E Komo Mai!

This weekend, you can stop dreaming of that tropical trip you wish you had the time and money for, and enjoy a slice of island life for real at the 11th annual Aloha Festival in the Presidio.

Get up off your hammock and put on your grass skirt for this two-day feast of all things tropical, including music, dance, arts and crafts, delicious food and a chance to learn some new island skills. Sway to the sounds of the ukelele and lose yourself in the hypnotic hula, performed by native Polynesian musicians and dance troupes. Or take a workshop in slack-key guitar or Hawaiian chanting -- also called 'oli -- and learn how to make your own beautiful music. Fill your belly with some scrumptious island cuisine, like saimin, lomi, kalua pork, plate lunch and much more.

Canoe enthusiasts can watch master paddlers take on the chilly waters of the Bay in the Round the Rock Alcatraz Challenge (Saturday morning), a tough nine-mile course from Alcatraz to the Bay Bridge and along the waterfront. Kids will enjoy the activities in Ohana Korner. Anyone and everyone with island roots, as well as those who can appreciate this culture, won't want to miss this event.

SF GatePresidio Parade Grounds, SF; Sat-Sun 10 am-5 pm; free; (415) 281-0221; www.SanFranciscoAlohaFestival.org/