As some of you know (and by "some," I mean "one"), I happen to share employment with a lovely young lady of Chinese descent. Why her nationality is important I don't know, but to avoid confusion, for the rest of my post I'll refer to her as "A." No wait--"B" is much better. No, that might be difficult to remember. I have it--"B6." Hold on, that's the vitamin I take to drive the last remaining ounces of water out of my rock-hard musculature. Let's call her "W."
W is very strongly involved in a business known as "Hug Life." She sells apparel and all the proceeds go to various charities, supporting causes such as the prevention of teen suicide. Why anyone would want to prevent that is beyond me; damn young people. No respect. But I digress.
W and I are not exactly close. In fact, the number of times we've talked is about equal to the number of conversations Langdon Alger has had with a girl in the past year. But she still saw fit to approach me recently and ask, "S.O.G, do you want to buy a shirt?" Of course, I promptly told W "N-O" and went on my merry way. Later on, she was in my office lamenting the fact that she had yet to sell a single shirt. I just couldn't bear to see her in such distress, so I kicked her out of my office and closed the door. But a few days later I had this revelation: "Hey, maybe those punkasses on the blog would like that stuff!"
So from the titanium cockles of the machine in my chest that acts as a heart, I give you the official Hug Life information:
Welcome to the Life!
The mission: to embrace who you are and appreciate the life you've been given, regardless of circumstance. Hug Life serves to remind all of us to focus on what is really important; our friends and families, and all others who share in both the greatest joys and surmountable tribulations that life throws our way!
Proceeds go towards charitable contributions for a variety of great causes including:
* Didi Hirsch Community Mental Health Center. www.didihirsch.org
* Hands On Bay Area. www.handsonbayarea.org
* The Wellness Community. www.thewellnesscommunity.org
And more to come! As the line grows, so will the charitable giving!
Be among the first to rock Hug Life! Buy a shirt, wear it well, and tell people more about the cause when they ask!
And here are the pictures:
Apparently at least one person on this blog is female, so maybe you'd like to "rock" this apparel. Do any of you guys know any females that might be into this? Ah, who am I kidding? Of course you don't. But maybe Terrence Maddox can appease B and C with some Hug Life to get them to stop fighting over him for two seconds.
And as you can see, Hug Life "gear" isn't only for girls; I've already spotted Freefall Jones in the shorts. So even if you don't want any for yourself, try to spread the word.
W sells the clothing from her car at work, and I can pick it up if anyone's interested. But if you don't want to go through me, and I don't blame you for being intimidated, you can contact the company directly at www.huglifeinc.com. In fact, that might be easier since W has a strange habit of avoiding eye contact with me. She's probably intimidated too.
And by the way, anyone who doesn't buy one of these shirts is a vile, disgusting, Hellbound excuse for a human being. And have a happy Easter!